I looked over at Charlotte, “She was dying, and spent her time trying to
cheer me up! I knew she was in great pain most of the time, but she
refused any painkillers until just before the end, because she wanted to
be with us, mentally as well as physically, for the time that she had
left. Those have become my most treasured memories of her. That wan,
skeletal face that used to be so beautiful, in those last weeks seemed
to glow with an inner light, and I was humbled in the face of her courage.”
Charlotte nodded, “Yeah, I met a lot of people like that at the
hospital. They helped me through the radiation and chemo, and the
depression and fear, even after my husband caved and bailed on me.
Bastard couldn’t stand looking at me after they took my breast!”
I had no comment to make on that, and didn’t really want to dwell on
this particular subject any longer, so I shook my head to show my
disapproval of her husband’s weakness, then changed the subject.
“So, how long have you been riding?”
Charlotte looked a relieved and said, “About three years. Used to jog a
lot but it was getting hard on my joints, so I took some of the money
from my divorce settlement and bought this bike. Took me a while to get
used to the clipless pedals. Seemed like I was falling down at almost
every intersection! Used to wear kneepads and skater’s wrist braces when
I rode.”
“Yeah, I know what you mean.” I replied, “I started on a mountain bike
with toe clips, but my knees weren’t liking the angle forced on my feet
by the clips, so it was clipless or stop riding. I practiced on the
trainer until I got used to twisting my feet out of them, but it was the
unusual situations that got me.”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, I could remember to unclip yards before I got to any intersection
or other predictable stopping point, but one time I was making a slow,
tight turn on gravel, and the bike got unstable. I was able to get my
outside foot loose, but the bike fell toward the inside of the turn. I
think I was picking gravel out of my knee for three days after that!”
Charlotte laughed and we swapped anecdotes of our riding experiences for
a few more miles. When we reached the Corners, we took a breather and
each ate an energy bar before heading back.
Charlotte, it turned out, lived only a couple of blocks past my house,
so when I invited her in for a cold drink, she accepted.
We talked about cycling and other things for a while, then she pulled at
the sweat-soaked fabric of her jersey and said, “I’d better get home and
take a shower, or these are going to get so crusted I won’t be able to
get them off!”
On impulse, I said, “Why don’t you just shower here? I’m sure I’ve got a
clean robe or something around here that you can wear. I’ll put your
bike on the rack and drive you home later, if you like.”
She looked at me speculatively for a moment, “Are you coming on to me, Ted?”
“Isn’t that obvious?” I smiled, “I’m a little rusty at it, but…”
“I like you, Ted,” she said seriously, “but I’m not up for a pity fuck,
so if it’s okay with you, I’ll just shower at home.”
I was dumbfounded! “Pity fuck! I don’t DO pity fucks, Charlotte! I’m
coming on to you because I like you!”
She eyed me some more.
“Ted, if you’re lying to me…” she said.
“Look, Charlotte,” I said, in all sincerity, “I don’t want you to do
anything you’re not comfortable with, but you’re an intelligent, witty,
attractive woman who happens to have some interests in common with me.
In every other instance where I’ve met women under those circumstances,
I tried to make sure we could spend as much time together as possible.
Is there some reason why this situation should be different?”
“You know very well there is, Ted.” She glanced briefly at her chest to
indicate the reason.
“What the hell does that have to do with the price of tea in China?” I
asked, “It’s not your chest that’s kept me laughing and involved in the
conversation for the last couple of hours! If things work out the way
I’d like them to, I won’t be fucking your chest, either! Look, tell you
what: Let’s shower together and see how it flows. If, at any time, you
don’t like the way things are going, then tell me so. I’ll back off and
see that you get safely home, okay?”
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